Remembering Baxter

I needed some time to process what happened last week before writing this post. I recently took a trip back to Philadelphia to put my dog down. Baxter was truly one of kind. I remember answering an ad in craigslist. My Ex at the time and I at the time were looking for a pet and I had always wanted a dog. This owner took an interest in our request and had forwarned us of other potential suitors. He had a back disablilty and an upcoming surgery that would prevent him from having the energy to care of Baxter. This gentlemen was left in the care of his wife and extended family. They lived in a huge house with an imaculate back yard and big pool. When we got to their house, we waited in their back padio for them to introduce us to their dog. Baxter ran at me with all of his full bronze energy and sunshine, he basked me with hugs and kisses like we were long lost friends being reunited. His owner revealed to us that Baxter wasn't as interested in the other candidates just based on his interactions. That was the deciding factor of letting me keep what would become, one of the biggest blessings, of my life. He was 2 years old at the time.

Baxter stayed with me after my heartbreak of a breakup. He pulled me out of the worst of my depression. He stayed with me when I met my wife, got married, had kids and ended in divorce. We had a lot of history together. Unfortunately, when I moved to Texas to start over, I could not take him with me so he was left in my ex's care. She loved him just as much.

Losing our son pained us so much. He was 13 with an aggresive form of cancer, which we only found out about after a vet visit concerning a wound that wouldn't heal. He never showed us any symptoms of pain or loss of appetite. He was very old. In his condition, no one was sure he would even make it through surgery. The only viable option was to put him down so that he wouldn't suffer. We put him to sleep under sedation before he was euthanized. There were so many tears shed for everything he meant to us. In some way, His passing healed me. It gave me a very unexpected closure. In his last moments while we were still waiting for his sedation to kick in, He kept jogging back and forth between me and my ex, almost to check if we were okay or if we were going to be okay. He left this world with both his parents holding onto him and covering him with kisses. He was loved till the end.